Why Do White Girl Teen Idols Always Go Slutty

       ITs a fact that if you want to have longevity in "show business" you have to stay relevant.  I don't think anyone who ever had a hit single or starred in a great TV series or even a great comedy special, just settled after that.  The goal is FOREVER for everybody.  The goal is Pryor, the goal is CHEERS, the goal is Marvin Gaye.  This can be achieved sometimes by reinventing your image or adding another talent to your repertoire.  We've seen this with many stars.  Rappers/Singers who act or actors who produce a pop album.  This new blurring the lines from singer to entertainer is nothing new or even frowned upon considering that the work to put into one is very difficult.  But anyway you can stay relevant is the way to go.

         My topic speaks for itself.  I typed in "twerk" into YouTube (because I'm a scumbag) and what do I find?  Miley Cyrus's music video WE CANT STOP.  This example of a young white girl teen idol gone slutty is pretty awesome.  Now don't get me wrong its ridiculous and her hair cut stinks and she keeps sticking out her tongue for some reason, but the ass shaking isn't bad.  The humping of the bed needs work.  When I saw this I wasn't turned on because ,lets face it, Miley Cyrus is awkward in this video.  She doesn't make me believe her slutyness as much as Christina Aguilera did when she came out with her debut slutty video DIRRTY.  Brittany Spears was even more believable with her crossover skank vids.  They both made you believe that inner slut couldn't wait to come out.  This Miley Cyrus Vid is embarrassing to the trend of "white girl teen idol turned bad girl who doesn't play by anybody's rules anymore".

       Why do white girl teen idols always go slutty?  Why not just come out a skank or stay the same like Kelly Clarkson.  Why stray from the route you were going?  You don't have to be a hoe bag for people to think you're an adult now.  I know people change but, come on, from 0-60 just looks like you have something to prove.  If its a phase then alright, I get it, you were told to be wholesome and told how to wear your hair.  You were told what to say.  Fine.  But really, slut is the first image you go for when you finally get that freedom that success bestows upon you at a certain level.

       Why not go deeper?  Why not take a break and gain some life experience so you can write better songs?  Assuming you write your own songs.  Why not ask your record label you want to go the Alicia Keys route, stuff you can just listen to instead of shaking your ass all the time.  People always want to take the easy road to forever.

       I guess to wrap this bullshit up.  If you're going to go the "I'm a bad girl now and I don't care who knows it" route, just make it believable.  Make me feel like those guilty thoughts I had  of the 15 year old wholesome persona was a fake because your inner "SKANKARELLA" couldn't wait to come out. 

www.gacomic.com

Can you just pretend to give a sh*t?

               Listen, if you really don't care to call me and tell me a horrible story or talk about your day or even ask me a question of what's going on, can you please text like you give a shit.   Me reading your shitty texts of misspelled words and unnecessary punctuation marks is a drag considering the text is one of the lowest forms of communication created.  I'm sick of deciphering modern day hieroglyphics to the point I just copy and resend back.

                             People used to write letters not too long ago and when you received one you were happy that person took the time to go to the store, buy paper and pens, sit down, write their thoughts, seal it and send it.  You felt good, the consideration and effort that person went through just to wait a week if you replied.  Why do only prisoners still enjoy that past time?  Then the telephone was invented, not as special as the letter, but it brought people together quicker incase of emergency.  Then came the invention of computers and emails, and that's when everything started going to shit.  And so this new half-ass language emerged and was created to express our wants and needs, our moods and thoughts, our ability to write or type or text as little as possible in order to get our point across.

                           This bullshit where people type things like "smh", "lmao", "stfu", (etc.) and the emoticon pictures to express how we feel, makes me sick.  I think, what a non-caring jackass.  If you can't even stand the sound of my voice for 2 minutes, at least show me the respect of complete words.  Instead I get this "when r u soon troops comedy club" followed by "not soon, doin".  Look you're already saving time by having a conversation that I can't interrupt.  You're already cutting out the whole importance of my time because half the stuff I get could have waited until I saw you again in life.  Jesus, can you just pretend to give a shit.

                             And if I hear another idiot talking in that language, I'm going to fucking lose my shit.  No self respecting person sees something amazing or horrific and says OMG.  You sound like a jerk.  Stop being an asshole.

www.gacomic.com

My Legs Fall Asleep

              Boredom and loss of imagination has given us so many great things in this "wifi generation". The mighty internet of the 21st century is a spectacle of modern boredom at its best.

                      My boredom comes at times when its really important for me to pay attention to my tasks at hand.  How many of us take our phones in the bathroom?  I know I do. I sit there thinking I'm killing two birds with one dump, but in actuality I've gotten bored going to the bathroom?  It hit me the other day, I've become a slave to thinking I'm supposed to be entertained every second of the day.  Even before I sit down, I already have CNN or YouTube ready to surf.  Why do I have to make my "dump time" interesting so much so that my legs fall asleep.  The pins and needles in my legs and the odor of a stagnant pond are both unnecessary, but this void of substance needs fulfillment.

                       I see those commercials, "don't text and drive", and I laugh.  It must suck to kill yourself and the last text is "ROTF". That's irony.  My denial is I don't identify with those people but in fact I am those people.  Even with the responsibility of a half ton carbon fiber and steel killing machine screaming at 80 mph down the highway, I fight the urge to update social networks.  I hate a good stretch of highway or red light because my boredom takes over and then I hear that notification ringtone.  I'm like a junkie fighting the itch of satisfaction received  from one of my dumb friends liking my post.  I know I shouldn't be bored while driving, with lives at stake, but this age of instant communication and -so called- entertainment is hard to kick when for 6 seconds I can watch some girl twerk on Vine.

                      This problem of no imagination and no motivation to create has run rampant throughout society.  People can become rich off boredom.  Talent is a thing for the dinosaurs.  Six seconds is all it takes for stardom.  The amount of disinterest in creating substance is a travesty of epidemic proportions which enables my boredom.  The majority of this world could give a crap about context, as long as you entertain them while using the bathroom or while they wait for their white soy mocha grande.  The over saturation of "entertainment" is boring in itself.

                     I try to stump YouTube because I'm bored with boredom.  I typed "Shark VS German Shepard".  Fifty-two videos popped up.  We could point fingers and say it's society enabling or maybe it's the generation of non-imaginative jerks but lets be honest isn't this blog boring too.

www.gacomic.com      

                    

  

Kain Carter hack or hero by george anthony

Kain Carter, a "youtuber", has been recently accused of stealing the LATE GREAT PATRICE O'NEAL's material and using it as a platform of his perception in his vids on YouTube.  This travesty of plagarism has been denied by Carter on his most recent vid, where as, he admitts to spouting off THE LATE GREAT's entire body of work online "sometimes verbatim" as a sort of homage to PATRICE O'NEAL.  Saying in short that he (Carter) considers himself a vessel of PATRICE O'NEAL's voice and ideas.  Kain Carter was a "youtuber" before this admittance of using PATRICE's ideas/material and a very succesful one at that with almost 100 million views total on his channel.  The recent vids were brought into question by long time friend of Patrice, Dante Nero (as seen on TCWCQ). 

My hang up with all of this after seeing some of the vids for myself and my knowledge of Patrice as one of the best to ever perform stand up comedy, is this kid has the audacity to say he is a vessel yet only speaks of what is documented already.  If Carter was a vessel of Patrice O'Neal, which is complete horse shit, (channeling Patrice) people would say that Carter reminds them of Patrice.  To steal and profit is the number one rule you dont break from novice to the greats in comedy.  This ability to pay homage, but at first, pass another person's philosophy, another person's essence as your own is blasphemy in the comedy world as I know it.  Rules as I see it and have confirmed with other comics is 1. YOU DONT STEAL 2. DONT BE A HACK.  Now perception can dictate what a hack really is depending on material or if that person really is a goofy bastard and maybe even gets a pass as long as the crowd laughs.  Comics need to eat and other comics see that, but a 2 dollar whore is still a 2 dollar whore and should know their place.  Stealing on the other hand deserves the other hand in some countries.  The extreme is alittle much but I believe an example must be made in some shape or form.  This obivous disrepect to the craft of comedy would only be done by someone who knows hes only as good as his last vid.

The problem these days is people are scared to suck.  Scared to bomb.  Of course proven stuff works dummy thats why the other person was so successful at it.  Whether or not you believe a bunch of people on YouTube knew who Patrice was as a comedian is irrelevant.  Those people dont deserve nor ever wanted  to hear his work in life because they werent into comedy  in the first place.  Anybody that knows comedy and is a true fan of comedy knows Patrice O'Neal. Bomb like a man.  So you do 100 vids on YouTube at 3 or 4 minutes a piece.  The next 100 might suck but so what.  You raised your chin and took your lumps.

Truth and Righteous are just words to many but mandate life for others.
...."for the sake of honesty in comedy".....CQ  
      www.gacomic.com